18-year-olds' plans to move out of their parents' houses for the first time hit a snag when their third 17-year-old friend declares she's not moving in right away and not paying rent: 'It doesn't make sense to pay for somewhere I don't even live'

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Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
May 22, 2025 1:00 AM EDT

There's a reason why it's best to always get everything in writing when it comes to money, even (and especially) with close friends. Living together with friends and being financially bound to them in some way, especially when you're just moving out of your parents' place or the first time, is a recipe for disaster. Your first living situation out of your parents house will always be a tragic learning experience and will be incredibly trying to any friendships you might have decided to live with, and when money is involved, things can devolve into "every man for themself" very quickly. 

It really just makes sense to have everyone living somewhere on the lease to avoid issues like this, where someone doesn't want to pay. If her name had been on the lease, there would be no question whether or not she was on the hook for her portion of the rent. Sure, if you're not living there, it doesn't make sense to pay, and vice versa. But when you've made a commitment to move in and start paying rent for a place on a given date, you can't really just arbitrarily decide not to do that. Sure, if your situation has changed, then so be it, but you can't really expect to just hold your "spot" and move in in a couple of months. Really, what the remaining girls need to do is just find another roommate to take this girl's place.

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  • 01

    "AITAH for expecting my friend to pay rent even though she didn't technically sign the lease?"

    Okay so me (18m), and my friends R (18) and S (17f) planned to move in together after high school. We've been. planning this move for probably a year and a half and we finally signed the lease in March. Since S is 17 she is labeled as an occupant on our lease and only R and I had to actually sign it. I have plenty of savings and I knew I'd have to cover some bills for R for at least the first month but I'm fine with that. I knew S had been saving up for this move so I trusted that she'd be fine
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  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10508727552
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 03
    Finals came around and S texts me and says she failed several classes and she wouldn't be graduating this year. I wasn't super surprised and I told her she could probably just finish her degree online after we move. Apparently her mom only agreed to her moving if she graduated high school.
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  • 04
    Depending on what program she can get in to S can't move until August or December. She said she'd still pay her share of rent, but today her mom texted me and R and said it would be ridiculous to pay that for 5-6 months before S is even living there. S texted me awhile later and said she'd figure things out with her mom. Eventually she said she'd pay her share of our first months rent but it "doesn't make sense to pay for somewhere I don't even live" so after that she's not paying for anything.
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  • 05
    R and I don't need her for rent or anything. I can afford the place with my savings and I know my parents are willing to help out if I need them to and of course we'll both be working so bills will always be covered. I just think S and her mom's reasons for why she isn't paying are insane. I know she didn't legally sign anything but if you verbally agree to do something like this and you realize you can't you should just deal with it and pay what you said you would. It's not like she's completel
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  • 06
    I know she can afford it. The whole reason she failed her classes is because she started picking up every shift her coworkers offered her and stopped doing anything for her classes. The city we're moving to is pretty hard to find rentals in with all the colleges and some stuff they have going on and there's several other reasons (that I'm not getting into on reddit) that we can't just cancel the lease and find a new place.
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  • 07
    My dad thinks that I shouldn't take any money from S since her and her mom are being like this. S says we should just find another roommate until she can move in since it's a four bedroom house. I'm meeting up with R tomorrow to talk about this. It seems like the plan is for S to pay her share of the first month and leave me and R, but mostly me, to pay for everything else until she decides she's ready move in. I still
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  • 08
    think she should deal with it and just pay her share of the rent. Yeah it'll eat up a lot of her savings and she's going to have to cut down on her hours if she wants to actually gradate this time but that's life and she should have thought about this sh before R and I signed the lease.
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roommate teenagers friends roommates rental high school renting immature high schoolers entitled people moving out
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